Movie review: The Secret Life of Pets
I just got back from seeing The Secret Life of Pets. This is a movie which I had promised myself I wouldn’t see in theaters. The trailers were so bad and boring. No good jokes, no character reveals, and no story shown. Unfortunately, that’s because the person editing the trailer had no good jokes, characters, or story to include.
Long and short of it
The story of the film is about a dog, Max, who finds himself with a new roommate. This happens, of course, because his owner decided she wanted a second dog. After the two pups argue and fight for roughly an hour (in-movie time, not run time), they both get picked up by a dog catcher. The two then forge a friendship through their trip across New York City to get home.
Along the way they run into a gang of “flushed pets” who live in the sewer. The sewer animals are working together to overthrow the human race. At least that’s what they claim…
The entire gang of FPs (yes, the flushed pets act like a stereotypical street gang, and call themselves FPs) are led by a diabolical, cruel, EXTREMELY racist bunny. I don’t mean the bunny is racist towards other animals, I mean as I was watching the over-the-top writing for the rabbit made me a little uncomfortable. Think the average black character from “the hood” in any 90’s sitcom.
Small glimmer of good
One of the few redeeming qualities of the movie was actually how accurate each animal seemed to be depicted. Dogs seem to live for their owners (as most do in real life). Cats seem to do whatever they want and all but ignore their owners (in my experience, also true in real life). The hawk has killer instincts and tries to eat smaller animals multiple times instead of just mindlessly working as a team. All of this is good stuff, just not good enough for me to give it a thumbs up.
Overall, the movie wasn’t bad. It definitely wasn’t great either. I would encourage anyone who has kids to save it for a discount theater, or even Redbox it. Anyone without kids can probably skip it.